I was thrilled the first time my then-four-year-old walked over to me during a dinner with friends and asked, “Mommy, may I have another salad?” Trying not to dissuade him by looking too happy with his request, I got up and fixed him another salad. He has found this to be the easiest request to get an affirmative response out of me. Even if I've already put all the food away and finished cleaning the kitchen, I can't help but oblige a child asking for more salad.
But this past week I heard something new: “Mommy, could I have a fourth salad?” I paused, considering, “Daniel, I think … maybe … you've had enough salad. I mean, I don't think it's going to hurt you, but you might need something with some more calories.” I know I wasn't convincing, and I'm still trying to decide whether I was wrong, but at that point I was trying to avoid being awoken at 3 a.m. by a little voice whining about being SOOO hungry. Nevertheless, being asked about a fourth salad feels like a victory in this land of fast-food, microwaved meals and kids who will only eat mac-and-cheese, chicken nuggets, and tater tots. It feels like the time my middle son, who was six, asked me “what on earth” another boy at his Taekwondo school had, and I had to explain that it was called a Happy Meal. (There are plenty of things I've done wrong with my kids, but I'm going to go ahead and feel victorious when I can!) For the last couple of years I've been telling my friends about the benefits of green smoothies. “They're like a multivitamin in a glass, only better, because they're whole-food.” “They're wonderful protection against osteoporosis and anemia, and they're relatively cheap and easy to make.” I'd even say, “Kids love them. Just call it an Incredible Hulk Smoothie and kids will think it's great.” Ironically, my own kids didn't buy my enthusiasm, and they finally went on strike. Okay, it wasn't a strike, but they did approach us with a request: could they just have salads instead? It was the first time they'd asked about ceasing green smoothies without sounding whiny, so we listened. We agreed they could have non-green smoothies in the morning, but they had to have at least two salads per day. And they were going to make them, not I. I do try to check for cut-up veggies during the day, but they have taken on the task of actually assembling their salads, and I often delegate cutting a cucumber or a pepper. They have to be full bowls, with at least half dark greens like spinach, kale, and chard. (We're blessed to have a warehouse club in our town where we are able to buy organic greens for $4/pound. If you don't have a warehouse club near you, check around for restaurant suppliers and farmers markets.) So now, when it gets to be that dreaded, almost-dinnertime-but-it's-not-ready-and-we're-hungry-NOW-hour, I can simply say, “I'm making dinner. Why don't you go make your second salad?” My kids did not always want salad and it's been a process to get them to where they are. I think it's been easier because we started changing our diet when they were still pretty young, but I don't think it's a food that most people naturally take to at first. I think you can train yourself with what you need, and eventually it will become something you like. I know there are as many thoughts about how to get kids to eat good food as there are opinions about what we should eat in the first place. I'm not going to say which is right, but following are the methods that worked for us: I served salads before dinner, and I told my boys it was because they were the most important foods. I worded it that way so they didn't get the idea that it was the undesirable thing you have to eat before you could get “the good stuff.” I know there are different schools of thought on when salad should be eaten, but I didn't do a bunch of research on “before vs after the meal.” I simply figured it would be better received if they were hungrier. It was not presented as optional, but it was not forced, either. A kid who truly ate most of it but said there were “just too many dry greens” at the bottom was listened to. Requests to stop getting the “purple lettuce” were heeded. (They were right- that stuff is bitter!) My child who was most resistant was allowed to eat his salad “bite for bite” with his other food, and then eventually was allowed to have a veggie plate instead. At first I thought I was not supposed to give in to him, but I finally realized that if I forced the issue I was going to make him hate salad. He would likely never eat one again once he left my house. Later we realized he has some real sensory processing issues, so the greens really were bothersome to him and I'm glad we didn't force him. He spent years making decorative veggie plates for himself and now he wants to be a chef. Also, now he will eat salad. I'm a big fan of salad dressing. I let my kids, for the most part, pick their dressing. I've actually had to discourage one son from eating his salad plain, because we really do need the fat to absorb the fat-soluble vitamins in salad. (See http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/80/2/396.full) We've gradually progressed from unhealthful, to not-so-bad, to better-but-expensive store-bought dressings. My kids now think it's fun to make our own. Just start with a basic recipe online and tweak it based on preferences and what you have on hand. It really is easy, I promise. There have been stages in my life when I know I could not have handled having to do even that one small extra task, so if that's where you are, don't worry about it. Pick a dressing that will get your family eating salad and don't stress about it. Stress isn't good for you! I know some people like to hide vegetables in creative ways, assuming their children won't eat them and could never like them. I think that's a valid survival strategy for a very difficult child who likely has nutritional deficiencies, but I also think we need to present our kids with the best food options as the best food options. There are ways to make vegetables, even salad, accepted by our kids and even fun. I love the fact that my boys are now taking ownership of their options--salad vs green smoothies--and even taking on the job themselves.
56 Comments
3/11/2015 06:38:29 pm
My husband and I eat a box of organic greens for our dinner every night and sometimes want a second salad! Our toddler isn't into greens too much yet (it's the consistency) unless I snip them into miniscule pieces, but seeing as how she likes pretty much everything else we eat, I feel hopeful that she'll be a salad lover as well.
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My daughter is almost two. She keeps wanting to copy her brothers and requests a "sal-ee" almost every night as they're fixing theirs. She'll eat olives and cucumbers, but she keeps pulling lettuce out of her mouth and saying, "Don't like." But she keeps trying!
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Wow, that's a lot of salad! I wasn't raised eating a lot of salad but have tried to raise my kids to know & appreciate one. My daughter (now 12) has been enjoying them for a couple years now but my son (age 9) isn't there yet. I tend to push protein with it so there's some lasting energy & satiety with it. I want my kids to enjoy eating carrots without needing to dunk them in ranch dressing though like 99% of kids their age. I think that's become the new ketchup! Since my daughter was diagnosed as Type 1 diabetic last summer, we've learned that even very healthy & nutritious foods can be carb-heavy, requiring insulin the same as would unhealthy options like sweets. Interesting perspective!
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I always get the strangest looks when my five year old son orders a salad at a restaurant. My kids love salads and so do I! Don't get me wrong I also love a giant bacon cheeseburger and they do like their McDonalds happy meal, and I don't make green smoothies (even though I have researched them and think it is a great idea) but at least I did something right and they like salad too! I do need to try to be a little healthier too but truly when I don't force the vegetable but just have them at every meal my kids eat them, I don't have to hide them or sneak them in. If it's an option it's eaten. Sometimes I do have to make them try something new and it doesn't always go off without a hitch but for the most part if you show by example and have those options kids will eat them. (well not all kids)
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A kid asking for his 4th salad is a wonderful problem to have. Wow, kudos to you for introducing healthy eating to your kids. I think it's so important to start them young. If the parents/guardians eat healthy, chances are the kids will too...they mirror our food choices.
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3/13/2015 05:20:45 pm
This is so interesting! I never had trouble getting my daughter to eat veggies and salads. However, my picky eater son refuses to eat cooked veggies, yet he has always loved salad. You're right, we need to present the best food options and not worry so much about hiding nutrition. Fourth salad is pretty funny, you're teaching some wonderful habits!
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I never have subscribed to the idea of "hiding" veggies for my kids to eat them. I watched a family member growing up prepare 4 different meals each night for her family because of the "picky" eaters that had developed & determined that I was not going to be that mom. We eat lots of salads, raw veggies, green smoothies, etc in our house and my children eat most everything I offer. Sounds like you are doing a great job of exposing your children to good, healthy foods & setting them up to eat well as adults!
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3/14/2015 02:01:48 pm
It is amazing to hear that your are teaching your kids to eat the right foods first. I know with my daughter that kids can grow to love healthy foods if they are offered multiple times as a choice without being pressured.
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3/14/2015 03:45:04 pm
Sounds like you really have it down. My kids are grown but we eat salads like crazy around here at least a couple of times a week but we eat alot of other vegetables with our meals. Lots of brocoli and carrots.
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3/15/2015 08:58:02 am
Congratulations on raising salad eating children. Thank you for listening to your children about their likes and dislikes and finding solutions instead of forcing them. If more parents would do this, more children and adults would eat their vegetables. Have a Fabulous Day!!
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You know, my mom told me that she was forced to eat things as a child. She still has what she calls a "nervous stomach" and she hated dinnertime for a long time. I don't remember her ever making us eat something, and I really didn't want to do that to my kids.
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I have always loved salads. I don't get them very often, though. When I was five, I was in the hospital and they told me I could have whatever I wanted to eat. I asked for a salad. My parents asked if I was sure, and even told me I could have ice cream. I did not change my mind, and I got my salad.
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I can easily get my guys to eat wilted lettuce. (I know bacon and bacon grease, but whatever works.) My son surprised me the other night, with how did you know I was craving that, when I fixed him broccoli. Congrats on getting your son to eat salad so much. I think I could eat more salad, but smoothies....something about green gets to me.
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Kimberley
3/15/2015 07:20:45 pm
Wow that's awesome that your kids ask for salad! I don't have kids yet, but I remember being made to eat certain vegetables I did not like when I was a child. (And do not eat as an adult) I will definitely take this approach when the time comes, and will share with my best friend - she's always curious about ways to encourage her daughter to eat all kinds of food.
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I love your approach in emphasizing the importance of the food! We are currently working on retraining ourselves to what "healthy" food actually is. It is so hard for me so I really appreciate reading your balanced approach to it.
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3/16/2015 08:52:59 am
I remember one of the first times that took my son to the party. The moms said it was "candy time" and my son walked over to the table of fruits and veggies and made himself a plate. Children learning to love real and healthy food is extremely important and great to learn while they're young.
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3/16/2015 08:09:31 pm
I like your positive approach to this. Two out of three of my girls enjoy salad. The third one is on the autism spectrum and has sensory issues. She loves fruits, but not so much vegetables. I've gotten creative with juicing/smoothies for her. Thanks for these tips!
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Yes, my son that we didn't force to eat salad is on the spectrum as well, which definitely contributes to the sensory issues. He couldn't stand the texture. He eats with plastic utensils, too, because of the scraping sound of metal ones. It's been amazing to watch him blossom lately.
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3/17/2015 04:57:03 pm
I am a big salad lover--the bigger the better, but I have been trying to get my husband to eat more salads and you are right, a delicious dressing can make it easier to get family members to eat salads. My hubby prefers heavier dressings that I don't really approve of, but if he ingests a few lettuce leaves and a tomato or two I am elated.
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3/19/2015 11:25:11 am
It is so important to teach your kids to eat healthy when they are young, you are on the right track. My husband is obsessed with dressings and sauces. He has it on everything...salad, meat, vegetables. Not the healthy example.
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3/19/2015 11:33:07 am
That's awesome that they're asking for more. I find that there is always something healthy kids like; it's just a matter of finding it.
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3/19/2015 11:37:41 am
I am a huge salad lover myself. All my kids loved salads but not every day I don't know if I could eat the same thing every single day but I really admire your discipiline. I mainly eat healthy lots of fish and salad but I love an occasional cheeseburger every once in a while.
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3/19/2015 11:53:37 am
This is a great blog. Thanks for sharing this post. I really did enjoy reading it.
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3/19/2015 11:59:18 am
It is important to teach our kids about healthy food. Our hope is that they will like it and eat it. Thanks for the inspiration.
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3/19/2015 02:09:34 pm
That's awesome that you're teaching your children to eat healthy right from the get go. My son isn't a big fan of salads, but does love veggies in general. He loves, broccoli, raw carrots, cucumbers and potatoes. And, even though they're fruit, he loves tomatoes and avocados. So, I'm definitely okay with that!!
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I wish I would have started having salads before every meal when my boys were young. I LOVE salads and vegetables and like your son I could eat it plain. One of my favorite things to do with salads is to add all kinds of things to it. I like my "spring" greens with added spinach, some walnuts or pecans and mandarin oranges. Add a few dried cranberries and YUM! I also just like to cut up a bit of baked or roasted chicken with dried cranberries and a bit of dressing.
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3/19/2015 02:46:24 pm
Keep up the good work of teaching your children that vegetables are not yucky. Have a Fabulous Day!
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I'm so impressed! I love that he asked for a fourth salad. I wish I had been brought up like that. I have a salad for lunch every day, and I admit I don't especially love it. But when I can talk my husband into buying spinach instead of mixed greens I like it a little better. We try to always make our own dressings because it's cheaper and it tastes a lot better. Kudos on your salad-eating children!!
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3/19/2015 04:25:14 pm
Congratulations on raising an herbivore! What wonderful eating habits you have instilled in him. Perhaps he needs more protein in his diet to curb his cravings? AS a physical therapist, I treat professional hockey players and that is a common quick fix for those ravenous men. Kudos to your wise parenting!!
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3/20/2015 05:16:56 am
Good article. I raised 15 kids, most of whom were special needs adopted "interesting" children and I was able to find a balance at meal times too. Your suggestions are right on and greatly needed by families these days. I'll never understand parents who can't get their kids to eat healthy meals. It's not that difficult - you did a good job showing how a parent can be creative and yet firm.
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3/21/2015 01:48:54 pm
Now I am hungry for my chicken spinach salad. Yummmm! My kids love it too which is always a big bonus :-)
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What a great post! Thank you for sharing what you've learned about getting kids to eat salads. My oldest hasn't become picky yet and still enjoys eating green beans with just about every meal, but I would like to make sure he gets more and more well-rounded when it comes to his food.
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